This post lives in a fantasy land that doesn’t really exist. Making mistakes and being wrong are often not safe, especially for groups of people with less access to privilege. Disenfranchised folks risk losing jobs, hard-won statuses, and self-perception that can be an effective shield from bigoted consequences including literal violence. That makes it all the more important that those of us who do have more access to privilege try to model and normalize mistake-making. The consequences will still exist: yes, people will be judgmental; yes, we might get criticized; yes, it might feel bad; yes, it is very possible we will also lose social capital that is important to us. Those are sacrifices that I think we need to be willing to make in order to help change a culture where the individual is valued above the collective and where rightness reigns supreme. 

What does that mean? It means that (1) We give a good faith effort to speak and act out of our best selves (so yes! Hire a sensitivity reader for your essay if you can), but know that we will still falter. (2) When we falter, name it, own it, take time to listen and grow, and find a group or groups of people who can help you to be better in the future. (3) Remember: this isn’t about you. You are just one human, a product of white supremacist, patriarchal, capitalist culture. You’ve just learned something! That’s good for the species. That’s one step forward. 

Sophie Lucido Johnson is a cartoonist for The New Yorker and the author and artist of the book Many Love. Follow her on Instagram.